.wow, 24 weeks.

so this post is slightly premature.. but this week marks viability. not saying if i were to go into labor that this little boy would survive, but there's a chance and that's a slight sigh of relief. and believe me, i'm not asking for a micro-premie. that would be tough! but i guess i'm just trying to say that i'm so grateful to have made it this far, and feeling as good as i do. i've been feeling a little sad lately because i just don't feel "connected" to this little guy yet? is that bad? i mean i love feeling him and i talk to him and i just try and envision the day that cameron and i get to meet him. i hope it is still my insane coping mechanism that infertility taught me.. thanks, infertility...i really appreciate it. anyway, i'm not a worrier and people always tell me, "just wait til you see his little face, you'll melt" and i have NO doubt that those words are true. i'm still very excited and i've had some wonderful moments, just me and him, where he's tossin' and turnin' and i have to laugh. it's so weird and beautiful at the same time. i think my mom is slightly bummed that she hasn't felt him, but i have an anterior placenta that makes the little movements hard to feel from the outside.. but cameron has seen him in there rollin' around.. he's in awe. i have to hand it to my husband. he's great and so excited for this baby. sometimes i wonder if he's more prepared than me.? he's great. i know he'll have such a stellar relationship with our little guy, one i'll most likely to be jealous of. well for stats purposes, i have felt the little one kick most of the time..he definately doesn't sleep more than he's awake, in my opinion. he's over a pound now and probably cute as can be. people are still pretty shocked that i'm 24 weeks almost...because i just haven't "popped" yet. i know it's comin'. i've been pretty lucky that i don't have to really worry about what i eat...i just eat when i feel like it. works pretty good. i see my ob on wednesday and i'm hoping she's ok with my 6 lb weight gain... we'll see. i seriously couldn't eat more or better if i tried. i get so full, so fast! i probably drink a gallon of milk every day or so. so as far as belly pics.. there aren't too many yet. we took some at the u of u game last sat but i look pudgy, not pregnant. i'll see if i can post one soon.. because i'm not sure if this will be my one and only pregnancy? i would be so sad if it were, but we feel very strongly about adoption still.. we'll see. happy 24 weeks to us.

.the name.

so i'm not usually a fan of asking people's opinions about baby names, mostly because it's the parents and the kiddo that have to live with the name, so it really shouldn't matter what other people think. but i'm going to put some of the names we like out there, some only i like, and some only cameron likes, and just see what you think. ultimately we'll be deciding together and this blog will have no influence...but just for kicks??

-gunner
-crew
-bauer
-griffin
-wyatt
-greyson

so we obviously don't really go for the popular names, can you tell? what do you like. we're pretty sure the middle name will be cameron, but it has to flow with the OWENS last name. :) have fun giving us your input.

.photo.

.our little boy.

2o weeks

.20w0d.

so i wasn't able to post much last week and i wanted to write about the BIG ultrasound. i've heard ladies talk about it and you think you know what to expect going into it, but cameron and i were both pretty awe-struck with how great it was. it truly is a miracle all those little cells, that began as two single cells, all know where to go and what parts to create. seriously, amazing. i remember taking an embryonolgy class at the U and feeling the same way, but it's so incredible when it's YOUR two cells that it starts from. anyway, the ultrasound was great, the girl that did it was so nice, telling us all about each image she recorded. the images were so wonderful. to see those 4 chambers in the heart and the actual heart valves pumping away! WOW! and to see all the structures of the brain, even the tiny ones, that produce the CSF...unbelievable. and of course, there was no mistaking the gender.. loud and proud, he is very boyish! anyway, you get the gist. we were so glad to hear all the great news that our IVF/ICSI baby is (mostly likely) not going to have anything wrong with him.. he's such a little miracle and we couldn't be more happy to meet him. i have had some panicky moments (which is NOT like me) where i feel like he's not going to be cute or something...normal, right? it's so weird being a worry wart...because it's SO NOT like me. i really couldn't do that full time, it's exhausting. it has been pretty amazing feeling those little bubble-like feelings in my tummy..a little reassurance that he's still there. it's kind of nice having a little buddy 24/7 to talk to. i'm sure his little ears are already bleeding from me jabbing away all the time :) love you, little one.

.thrilled.

wow, what an amazing experience to see the little man's parts...
he looks healthy, good heart, good brain, good boyish parts...
we couldn't be more thrilled
can't wait to meet you, little guy

.16w1d.

well things are still moving right along. i had an appt with dr. g yesterday and luckily my mom wanted to come, since cameron had a meeting at work. my mom, like me, had also been anti-female-dr before, but she, like me, absolutely loved her! i was just as impressed with her seeing her yesterday as the first day we met. i was worried that she was going to scold me for not gaining any weight, but she really didn't even care as long as i was getting my 64 oz of water each day. i actually lost a pound and told her my appetite just sucks. and she said, don't worry about it, you'll get it back. good news. i am almost 100% sure we're having a boy. i even saw what he looks like in my dream...i know, i know, dreams aren't real, but this was borderline revelation, ha ha. anyway, he's cute and he has a little dark hair?? we'll see. i scheduled my ultrasound for august 24th so i guess we'll know then. other than that, everything looks perfect still.. no spotting and the heartrate measured 148... still great. as far as how i feel...still crappy some days, others, pretty good. still not complaining though.. it's all worth it. can't wait to meet the little guy (or girl, if i'm totally wrong), but i hope not before christmas is over.

.round ligaments, ugh.

maybe it's a little early to be having such dramatic symptoms, but geez.. they weren't kidding about that round ligament pain. i can't even cough without having to crouch over. i can totally feel them just stretching away.. or so i think. i'm still fitting fine into my normal clothes, which i find a little weird, since i'm into my 2nd trimester? but i'm not going to complain. i'm sure the belly will come. i also haven't gained a pound.? once again, not complaining, but i really eat well (ha ha) and didn't throw up much in the 1st trimester..so i'm hoping dr. g is ok with that. of course i'm going to question every little thing since it is my first and don't have a clue what being pregnant is like. i still find it SO WEIRD that i have NO proof of being pregnant...no real belly, can't feel kicks yet, and now i feel much better than before, so it really baffles me. if it weren't for that handy dandy doppler at work (oh, and maybe those ligament pains), i wouldn't believe it was true. anyway, i have my 16w appt in 2 weeks and i'm excited to see what dr. g says. can't wait to see her again.